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400 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 22, 2019
“I like rom-coms, and physical comedy, and all of these so-called frivolous scripts. Giving people a good time, making them happy, letting them escape for a while—that’s what I think is worthwhile.”
“She’s an overexposed, chronically confused crowd-pleaser, who’s built a career riding on her family’s coattails. A twirl through her grandmother’s work was inevitable, and unfortunately this is probably a practice run.”
“Digital mash-up of characters from different Jane Austen books, transplanted into a murder-mystery, house-party scenario. Outcome guided by the choices of the player.”
“Short-haired Lucius Malfoy. Tall. Sarcastic. Ice-blond hair. Ice in general.”
“You’re such a...fundamentally positive person,” he said, as if he were accusing her of a mortal sin.
“As [redacted] would say, we’ll have to get our Slytherin on.”
“Parts of life are shit enough. I look for the light where I can find it.”
“His tone conjured images of empty chocolate boxes, and the aftermath of a party, and missing the bus by thirty seconds, and all of life’s fleeting moments of gloom.”
“She could almost see him saying it, with the same expression he wore when discussing Elizabethan tragedy. The man looked like an assassin in a war film, and would be temperamentally suited to the part. He probably even orgasmed with a frosty stare off into the middle distance.”
“His eyes were dreamy as his mind wandered off into that rosy future, where the estate wasn’t a crumbling, fund-draining millstone around their necks, and pigs flew over the heads of frolicking unicorns.”